As a continuation from a previous post, I’m now ok, on some
really important fronts. How I got there is something I want to write about
here.
Over the last three weeks I’ve been internally struggling
with an issue that I couldn’t understand. Someone I care about made a choice
that I didn’t agree with and I didn’t understand why they had made it. I had
spent days upset and wondering why and how and what lead to it. I questioned
every little thing I had discovered about the situation and analyzed it until it blew
the situation wildly out of proportion.
Then one day I had a real heart to heart with my Heavenly
Father asking him to help me to understand, or if anything help me to move past
the struggle I was in the midst of. I
opened up my heart and poured out my deepest feelings in sincere prayer asking
for help. And then it dawned on me; I have a choice.
I have a choice just like anybody else. I choose to be ok. Nobody
else has the ability to make the choice of whether or not I am ok. That’s 100%, no doubt about it, in-arguably my choice. So I decided to make that choice.
Regardless of whether the choice of my friend was right or wrong it was their choice,
not mine, and in that sense isn't my concern. I had legitimate reasons to be
upset at the choice, but regardless, spending my time upset at someone is selfish, and yet not even self serving. There are so many other emotions I could be experiencing instead. So I
began to get a grip and let it go.
I’m moving forward with my life making decisions that
positively affect my well-being. A really good friend of mine said to me when I
approached them about my situation to ‘take good care of [myself] and make
decisions just for [me].’ My life is still mine to live regardless of any
person place or thing I come across. Holding on to anger does more damage than
good, so why bother?
The state I’m in didn’t happen overnight. I was given
several opportunities to re-evaluate myself and the way I was approaching the
situation. One in particular was a talk (<click here if you want to read it)
I gave in church last Sunday on charity. While preparing it I did a lot of deep thinking and consequently began to see that person in a different light
than I had before. I began to see them with more charity, patience and understanding. I
may never get a full understanding of what happened, but it’s not my business
to know unless they choose to tell me.
They are still important to me, and probably always will be, but I've learned at least in this instance to get a grip and just let go. To be happy, focusing on the things in my life that i'm immeasurably grateful for. My family and friends who truly love me and want to see me happy. This gorgeous planet and all the beauty that unfolds in it. The gift of sight and hearing to enjoy every moment. The knowledge that as long as I'm trying my best to be Christlike that I'm going to be more than ok when it all comes down to the end.
We are all given the choice; the choice to live happily, unhappily, or anywhere in between. When it’s put that simply doesn’t it make sense to choose happiness? Let go of the pain. Let go of the hurt you might feel. Let go of what you might think you have a right to. Let go of the things that aren't pushing you forward in a positive direction.
They are still important to me, and probably always will be, but I've learned at least in this instance to get a grip and just let go. To be happy, focusing on the things in my life that i'm immeasurably grateful for. My family and friends who truly love me and want to see me happy. This gorgeous planet and all the beauty that unfolds in it. The gift of sight and hearing to enjoy every moment. The knowledge that as long as I'm trying my best to be Christlike that I'm going to be more than ok when it all comes down to the end.
We are all given the choice; the choice to live happily, unhappily, or anywhere in between. When it’s put that simply doesn’t it make sense to choose happiness? Let go of the pain. Let go of the hurt you might feel. Let go of what you might think you have a right to. Let go of the things that aren't pushing you forward in a positive direction.
I had to...
Later ;)
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