Where There is Love There is Life

this stinks. and it could just be the mood swingy girl in me, but this is just one of those moments. let me explain...you see, im not the kind of girl who is good and patient. i suck at waiying.. like SUCK. I have tried so many tines in so many different areas and this is the best ive ever done but its just making me stressed and giving me pimples and i dont know what to do... heres my dillema. little miss impatient here has a crush. a crush on somekne shes only actually seen a few times, and who lives too far away to see him for another month when school starts. now another thing about me is that i make it painfully obvious when i have a crush. and it went the exact same way with this guy except when i flirted i got a positive response. and im not used to that. so when he went back home i decided to try my darndest and stick to not sticking to it. lay low and let him come to me. well im doing pretty good considering my past... but im still the one who is coming off desperate and i hate it. i want to tell him but im afraid that he'll give me the old "just friends is good" and im getting a little upset about it. when i like a guy it normally goes south because i tend to think a lot. and my thoughts run rampid with could be's and what if's when im in this state of mind. i really dont know what to do anymore